arguments in my head!

Im not saying this in the literal sense (as i have bipolar) but, do you ever feel like you have a voice or feeling that keeps everything together and in its nice well presented box, and one that has just lost the use of its bowels and cant even put the kettle on????

My point is i will have hours where i am full of so much dread and negative¬†hopelessness that i sit and cry and belive im not good enough to be the mother and wife of three wonderfull people.¬†¬†Other times, i take a step back, i put things in perspective and say, “you no what?, you have a beautiful house, car, family and good stimulation for your mind and its only five years of your life that you have to cope with” “you can do it girl”!.

I do worry that even though i dont make my first payment until the 17th of May, that when i get my anual review they will attempt to put my payments on. I have planned every weeks money out up until next year, saving, holiday, food, clothing, products for my childrens care needs and im sure where going to be fine, well today anyway, lol.

I just want to make sure my children dont miss out on the things they need.

Ive already started buying presents for christmas! :)

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One Response to arguments in my head!

  1. Zachariah says:

    Thank you for trying to explain the terminlogy towards the starters!

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